The Healing Power Of Loving Relationships
How many times have you felt low, called a friend or family member and soon found yourself laughing, smiling and feeling so much better? Your health and the quality of your life are tied to the quality of your relationships (which may include your pets!) and your community of support. What is it that your relationships have that has the ability to enable healing to occur?
To answer this question, I share with you beliefs of one of my special mentors, Dr. Jeanne Achterberg, a psychologist and author known for her outstanding research dealing with imagery, healing, prayer, intention and her work with those who are diagnosed with life-threatening illnesses. In her newest work, her audiobook, Intentional Healing (available though Sounds True), which I highly recommend, she has described the five bonds of relationships which expedite healing. The essence of these bonds has been the heart of my work as a psychologist and a healer. They are the following:
The first of these bonds is the invisible energetic expression of Consciousness which includes distant healing, prayer, intentions and Mind. Einstein and his fellow physicists called these invisible ties “nonlocal mind” and emphasized their belief that we are all connected on some level. Thus, if I care for and pray for you – with the intention of healing, you will be impacted physiologically – and so will I! Loving intention establishes real ties between us. Scientific research has established this.
The second of these healing bonds is the power of Touch. Within relationships, you seek and need connection with one another through touch. Touch can be a big hug or kiss, a tap on the shoulder, cuddling, embracing, making love or petting your special pet, be it your dog, cat, horse or any other precious pet. Keep in mind that age does not slow or diminish the healing power of touch; indeed, it increases the need for touch. .
Why is touch so important? The healing power of touch is that it affirms you are a being with value and you are lovable. This is what you especially need to experience when you are diagnosed with a life-threatening illness and feel so isolated and apart from the world. If you are a caretaker, you, too, are in need of warm, compassionate and loving touch.
The third bond is that of Presence. Just your loving presence has the power to heal. You are pure energy and capable of feeling the energy of others. When you choose to be a loving presence, you are choosing to be unconditional Love, which conveys Truth and Love.
In Touched by the Extraordinary, you can read the story of physician Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, who hired the hospital cleaning attendant to be her special assistant. Why? Because this beautiful soul, who had traveled the difficult path of tragically losing her own baby while waiting for doctors in an emergency room, brought, as a loving presence, peace to Kubler-Ross’s patients who were dying. Having been personally affected and changed by the loss of her baby, this woman had the gift of being able to sooth and comfort those who were close to death.
For years I have been advocating the fourth bond described by Achterberg as the bond of a “Soul to Soul” relationship. As you live your life, no matter who you are, your goal should be relating to others at the soul level, rather than in the formal traditional roles, such as doctor-patient, parent-child and teacher-student. The “soul to soul” level is one that affirms your awareness of -and connection with- the higher part of one another, that part which is connected to the Source of each of you. When you begin to be conscious of being connected to one another as souls, love in the form of compassion, kindness and caring, comes so much more naturally.
Finally, the last bond, Love, is one which greatly contributes to your well-being. The fact that you know you are loved by another and that this love is something which is forever, conveys an eternal sense of support. Recent scientific research studies have shown that when a relationship is perceived as loving and supportive, there is a definite correlation with improved health, including fewer heart attacks and deaths, relative to the rest of the population.
The bottom-line message here is that you expedite your own healing when you choose to live your life within the embrace of a loving, caring and compassionate community of family and friends.
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon