“If I had an hour to live, I wouldn’t be calling anyone who owed me any money, or anyone who had wronged me in any way during my lifetime….With the time I have left, I choose to allow my thoughts to rest in total peace, right here, right now in this precious moment.”    ~Richard Carlson

Have you noticed that the moment you or a loved one receives news of a life-threatening illness, such as cancer, Parkinson’s Disease or ALS, or a significant loss, so much in your life suddenly takes on a different meaning?  

Instantly, you find yourself valuing time and everything else in your life in ways you could never have imagined. Suddenly, you find yourself discovering meaning in places, including relationships, which you had previously discounted. Perhaps, for the first time, you “get” what this experience known as “the journey of life” (your life) is really all about. And, even better, you know you are “getting it.

Country music artist Tug McGraw sings a song, “Live Like You Were Dying,” that is especially meaningful to loved ones (or those close to loved ones) who have been recently diagnosed with cancer or any other significant illness. Written when he learned that his father had been diagnosed with cancer, the song touched hearts everywhere. In fact, it secured the #1 position in country music in the United States for seven weeks. What I love about “Live Like You Were Dying” is that it reveals an immediate shift in perspective regarding what seems to matter or not matter after being told that you are dealing with a life-threatening illness or possible loss.

So often upon receiving unwanted and unexpected news concerning the possible shortening of our lifespan, we question the meaning of life or our life’s purpose, and this, in turn, leads to a stunning sense of clarity and intuitive knowing about these matters. For example, upon learning that he may be dying, the main character of Tug McGraw’s song wastes no time in engaging in activities he has always wanted to pursue, including skydiving, mountain climbing, fishing and bull riding. Even more significantly, knowing that life may soon end, he engages in faith- related matters, including reading the Bible and forgiving everyone. The listening public, as judged by their desire to hear this song, appears to recognize the truths that McGraw speaks for so many of us.

The Tibetan Buddhists have long known and advocated that life needs to be lived as though we are dying. This is something I share with my patients who are stuck in their attachments to issues, things, places and people which prevents them from fully living their lives. When you are aware that your time is limited, be it as a senior, a terminally ill person or someone about to lose a relative or friend, all the issues on which you focused that have kept you at a distance from your family and friends melt away.  It is at these times that your valuable material possessions seem much less valuable– but people you love and care about are more precious than ever. Why is this?  It has everything to do with Choice and your awareness of the power of Love. (To be continued)

Susan Barbara Apollon

Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun

©2010 Susan Barbara Apollon

p.s. For our seniors, please visit our Seniors 101 page where you will find a link for the Longevity Solutions Members Directory.

Have you noticed that when you are in need of a feel-good experience, and you find something or someone that fills you with inspiration, you suddenly feel so much better  – even bliss and joy? And, you may even feel a sense of intuitive wisdom or purpose rising up within you.

Awareness of what inspires you can be a key to your happiness, bliss, experiencing healing and even living with a sense of purpose. Just consider the beautiful, heartwarming story of Susan Boyle, which, thanks to the internet, has spread around the globe.

Personally, listening to the newest internet sensation, Susan Boyle, became my most recent source of inspiration. I click to listen, knowing that I will cry and be moved to tears as I listen to the gift of her unexpected magnificent voice.. Quite a paradox, if you stop and think about it.

An international sensation taking the world by surprise, Susan Boyle, in the video of her performance on Britain’s Got Talent, has touched hearts everywhere. No one, that I can recall, has inspired so many people throughout the world just by singing one song, amazing as that song is.

Seeing and hearing Susan sing I Dream a Dream from the Broadway show, Les Miserables, brings tears to just about everyone who experiences her. Is it because a dowdy 47 year-old woman surprises us with an unbelievable voice? Are we moved by the stunned looks and words of the three judges, some of whom are known for being rather nasty and sharp tongued with contestants who resemble Susan, an older gal, from a little village in Scotland, dressed plainly and with little or no makeup? Is it that the music is extraordinary? Or is it because, perhaps, we see ourselves in Susan, each of us holding a dream – a vision -, which we are able to make a reality before we come to the end of our life, as she does with this moving, superb and incredible performance?

And why is it that we like to listen to Susan sing I Dream a Dream as often as we do? Perhaps, it is because she inspires us. Yes, she represents hope that we, too, may be able to bring our dreams to fulfillment. When I hear Susan sing, I am inspired; that is, I am infused with the spirit of Hope, Joy, Enthusiasm, Possibility and Love. I feel good hearing her magnificent voice. She is a symbol of hope for me and for all of us that we need to hold onto vision– that anything and everything is possible.

When you choose to focus on someone or something which inspires you, you feel wonderful, full of hope, motivation and joy, enabling you to experience an energetic higher quality of life. A word or two of advice: If you want to feel good, make it a point to become more aware of what it is that inspires and infuses you with life-giving energy, joy and purpose. You will have a win-win situation! (To be continued…)

Susan Barbara Apollon

Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun

©2009 Susan Barbara Apollon

One of the nicest things about life is the way we must regularly stop whatever it is we are doing and devote our attention to eating.
~Luciano Pavaroti and William Wright~

Where there is love, there is life.
~Mohandas Gandhi~

Food is such a valuable aspect of self-generated ceremonial rituals. Furthermore, food is an expression of healing, loving energy which enables you to feel good and experience bliss. Consider your holidays and how important it is for you to include traditional foods and dishes always associated with specific holidays. Somehow, knowing the treats you will serve or receive as a part of your holiday meals seems to ground and stabilize you, enabling you to feel safe, rooted, deeply loved and that all is okay with you and your world.

As you go about preparing and eating the ritualistic holiday foods, remember to project or feel love in every morsel of food. Actually, it happens quite naturally. Personally, hot dogs and hamburgers convey love, comfort and healing joyful energy for me each July 4^th, as does turkey, my mother’s incredibly delicious stuffing and sweet potato pie with marshmallows and for Thanksgiving.

And how could I forget the matzo ball soup, gefilte fish, kugel and my home baked rugalah that have been a part of every Jewish family celebration? This is my heritage – and continuing the rituals helps me to preserve and more deeply root our family members. Think, for a moment, of your own family’s food-related traditions and feel the wonderful, energetic goodness of what this means to you.

Fortunately, for many of my friends, they are able to donate their time and energy to assisting their community members who are homeless by working at food banks. Others, I know, give of their time throughout the year and/or on the holidays to prepare and serve meals for those who have no homes. These acts become loving, ceremonial rituals which enable them to feel they are making a difference in the lives of others.

I often think about the women of the Holocaust who continued to find ways to celebrate special occasions such birthdays, holidays and anniversaries – and the Sabbath. These women understood that they could maintain a sense of some normalcy by continuing the traditions of cooking foods associated with their way of life, as well as maintaining rituals such as prayers and the lighting of candles at appropriate times. I have a cookbook written by the women of the Holocaust (something that I was amazed they could pull off, given the difficulty of their situation). Yet, I know that it is the meager food which was cooked with love and the meaning of the ceremonies and the rituals that sustained them and their families in those most challenging – and horrific circumstances.

Finally, have you thought about the many ways in which you carry on exquisite, loving, ceremonial rituals for your friends and loved ones who are ill, dying or who are grieving? Please consider these times in your life and the ways in which you and your family have either received or provided assistance, be it with a cooked meal , the running of errands, caring for children, being a chauffeur and support system for doctor appointments or assisting with hospital, insurance or burial issues and needs. Because you act from love, these rituals are all high energy shifting experiences for you, bringing you greater peace and comfort.

And, of course, there are the visits you make to either the hospital to be with the ill or to the funeral home or cemetery to honor the deceased. All of these help you and those with whom you visit by the gift of your presence at a time when it is very, very needed as an expression of loving support. You heal yourself and your loved ones by choosing such loving acts and rituals of compassion and kindness.

One of the secrets to a better quality life filled with joy is to consciously and wisely choose those rituals which will feel good to you and enable you to experience healing and well-being!

Susan Barbara Apollon

Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun

©2009 Susan Barbara Apollon

Remember, your cells are your own personal team of health-workers, with you as their captain. They know what you need for well-being, healing and harmony and they depend on you to meet their needs.. The moment you step out into the fresh air of a feel-good, warm, sunny, breezy day, you begin to release endorphins, enabling you to feel good. Just imagining being outside in your favorite places, doing what you love to do, causes you to release these needed chemicals of well-being which then expedites the healing response within the cells of your body.

One significant point here: despite the fact that excessive exposure to the sun is not healthy for you, exposure to some sunlight can actually sooth and comfort you and your cells, contributing to increased immunity.

Think for a moment about how you feel each time you imagine yourself in a treasured place, be it in your garden or taking your dog for a walk in a neighborhood park. Perhaps you enjoy seeing and feeling yourself horseback riding or fishing in the country or skiing down one of the trails at your favorite ski resort or on a local track? Do you notice that you are aware of the temperature, the warmth of the sun, the breeze caressing your face or the scent of the newest blossoming flowers and trees? Do you notice how good you are feeling?

Your body is finely tuned and sensitive to Truth and Beauty. When you gaze at a beautiful sunset or sunrise, or rainbow, or a newly snow-covered path, or if you happen to pick up the scent of a freshly cut lawn or an exquisite rose bush, the experience is registered as something so beautiful and spectacular that you again immediately produce the neurotransmitters which contribute to feeling wonderful. Why is this?

The answer is this: You are hardwired for bliss! In fact, the research findings of a new area of science, neurotheology, suggest that we are hardwired for God – or spirituality. Consider how often, while participating in some outdoor activity, such as walking or running on a beach or around the neighborhood, horseback riding, skiing, gardening, swimming, taking a drive in the country or biking, you have experienced a connection with your Higher Power, as well as with God.

 It is in these moments of connection that you have a sense of being One with All There Is. You feel more relaxed and actually shift to a higher energetic vibration. You feel more peaceful, more serene, more inclined to pray, and, very often, are deeply grateful for the opportunity to be able to be a part of your experience. For me, this time feels as though I am in the Zone! And I love every moment of it. How does this feel for you?

The essence of this piece is that you have available to you an amazing healing tool: Mother Nature. Make the most of this by choosing to engage in outdoor activities that bring you pleasure in the places you love most. Be conscious of how you feel when you are either imagining or are actually outdoors. Your body, referring to your entire team of loving cells, will appreciate you and provide you with an enhanced production of therapeutic chemicals which will serve your body, mind and spirit. Enjoy!!

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

“In order to be a realist, you must believe in miracles.” David Ben Gurion

When you choose to open the door to your heart and begin to allow in various extraordinary events, you open yourself up to a whole world of new and meaningful experiences, all of which have the capacity to take you to a deeper part of you, perhaps, even to the level of your soul. It is the beginning of you connecting with you, something that is so powerful that you know you are undergoing a transformation.

As you open to receiving a variety of messages and synchronicities, you will find yourself becoming conscious in a way you have never before experienced. Your consciousness will begin to allow you to experience even more moments of joy, inspiration and peace.

What follows is one of my favorite exercises which I use in seminars and with my patients to help nurture an awareness of the healing power of the extraordinary in one’s life. I borrow this from Rachel Naomi Remen, MD, who so beautifully describes it in The Will to Live and Other Mysteries (available on CD).

Take a few moments each evening and reflect on your day. First, take a few deep breaths, relax, and consider the question, What surprised me today? Then write about that for a few moments. Second, do the same thing with the question, What touched and/or moved me today? And third, again, do the same thing with the question, What inspired me today? I find these questions to be powerfully healing in that they connect you with a Higher Power and in this connection there is healing. The whole exercise should take no more than fifteen minutes. Do it for at least 10 to 14 days, and you will likely begin to notice a sense of feeling better, if not joy and peace.

A word of advice: if you are in need of working with a physician, be sure to align yourself with a physician who recognizes that to heal the body, you must heal the body and the soul. Trust your intuitive wisdom when you meet with your doctor. Your intuition or Higher Wisdom will let you know if this individual is one you should choose to allow into your life. If he or she listens when you speak of your intuition or what you sense is going on in your body, then you are probably with the right person.

As an example, I have had many patients share with me that during their treatment for their cancer, they began to have uncomfortable feelings regarding their physician. This led them to leave the doctor who was treating them and find another with whom to continue treatment. They believe that by being open to the extraordinary and listening to their inner voice, they have been able to experience success and healing in their lives. As always, the choice is yours as to how far you choose to open the door of your heart to the extraordinary.

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

Much of what makes life so wonderful, so delicious and so meaningful is related or connected to that which we can’t see, touch or feel, sometimes called the mysterious or the extraordinary, as well as to events we call synchronicities. So often, what is considered by some to possibly be a coincidence is considered by others to be a “synchronicity.” Specifically, “synchronicity” refers to events which you might think are coincidences, but which, in your heart and your whole being, you know are too meaningful to have occurred simultaneously, by chance.

Touched by the Extraordinary, a book I wrote and published in 2004, delves into the nature of extraordinary events and demonstrates that when you fill with love and compassion and open your heart to such experiences, it can lead to transformation and healing in your life. Originally written to help heal my patients who were dealing with the loss of a loved one, I expanded the intention of the book to enable you to know that when you harness your intuition and fill with love, you are more apt to experience a wide variety of remarkable or extraordinary events, all of which have the power to help you heal.

The following paragraphs include the kinds of situations which are often considered “mysterious” or “extraordinary.” Many refer to these as “signs,” implying that the event is especially meaningful and personal. When these signs occur, especially after they are requested, they tend to expedite the healing process. In fact, many of my patients who are deeply grieving the death of a loved one, share with me that receiving “signs” from them helps to ease their pain, as well as giving them hope that their loved ones are still with them, though in a different way. They often find this to be extremely comforting.

Such powerful events may include the following experiences in your life: wonderful synchronicities such as your intuition and precognition informing you someone is going to be calling or entering your life within hours, which is exactly what takes place; dreams in which you feel you have engaged in meaningful visits or communication with deceased loved ones or had an intuitive knowing and description of events about to happen; times when you have prayed and then clearly experienced answers to your prayers, including stunning healings.

Other types of “extraordinary encounters” include: hearing a voice which provides a message that saves your life (because you choose to listen to it); feeling the presence of a loved one who has died or experiencing their presence via electric lights and devices being turned on, ringing or blinking, as well as by smelling their favorite flowers, cigarettes, cigars, perfume or coffee (if they were big coffee drinkers).

Additionally, many have shared with me “extraordinary events” which have included seeing (having visions of) or experiencing angels, Masters, and deceased loved ones; also, having near-death experiences; noticing the frequent or atypical appearance of animals, butterflies, dragonflies or birds (such as an eagle, owl or cardinal) which were especially meaningful to a loved one who has died. (TO BE CONTINUED)

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

So many of us like to think that mind, body and spirit are separate entities; truthfully, as a psychologist who works with the ill and the dying, I now recognize that experiencing any kind of physical distress impacts you emotionally, mentally and spiritually. More than two decades of working with patients has shown me that mind, body and spirit are one. Furthermore, you can enable healing on all three levels by choosing to allow the extraordinary into your life.

Before going further, let us first define the word extraordinary. According to the Thorndike-Barnhart Dictionary (Random House), extraordinary is “beyond what is usual, regular or ordinary” and “exceptional to a high degree and remarkable.”

Next, we need to define heal and healing. According to the dictionary, heal is “to make whole, sound, or well; bring back to health; cure.” Healing is “that which heals or cures” as well as “getting well” and “the act of a person or thing that heals.”

Let’s put this together. You are extraordinary (meaning you are exceptional and remarkable); you were born extraordinary, though most of us tend to forget who we are, including the power with which we were born, and why we are here. Forgetting or disconnecting from your natural, inherent power leads to being off balance and feeling incomplete, not whole or well and in need of healing ( to be made whole and balanced).

By permitting yourself to be open to such remarkable and unusual experiences, you are connecting not only with your own wisdom, but with that of the Universe, and, in so doing, you are aligning with the powers of your own inherent intuitive knowing and your own Consciousness or Mind. This means that you can reclaim the power with which you were born, a power which may be forgotten but which is familiar to your whole being and which enables healing (ie .or the restoration of balance, harmony and wholeness) to occur.

For example, consider the following synchronicity: You are concerned about some health issue and intuitively feel there may be a health issue which you feel may need to be checked out. You then happen to be in a library or bookstore when a book falls off the shelf. As you pick it up, you notice that the page to which it opened is one which discusses the very matter about which you have concerns.

It behooves you at this point to consider the possibility of an alignment of your intuitive wisdom with the wisdom of your Higher Power or that of the Universe. This might then lead you to then considering the possibility that the extraordinary might help speed your healing– if you choose to listen to the message. On some level, you (i.e. the power of your thoughts and your intentions) contributed to that book falling from the shelf into your path.

Keep in mind that among your blessings is the fact that you live in an age in which you have scientific and technological advances providing you with powerful medicines and a variety of other kinds of healing aids or support. Yet, even with such strength coming from your physical world, it is your natural-born resources, historically used by shamans and healers, which enable true healing to occur; that is healing at your core and a healing which permeates every aspect of you, including your mind or consciousness, your physical body and your spirit or soul.(TO BE CONTINUED)

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

9. With grief and trauma, often come an outpouring of expressions of care, compassion, kindness, love, and prayers. Allow yourself to be deeply touched by such a showering of love. This can forever transform you so that you become more aware of the choice you can make to be equally caring, loving and kind. You may find that you are becoming aware, also, of the power of your own love, appreciation and gratitude for your blessings. Take time to express your heartfelt thanks. This, too, expedites your healing process.

For example, patients and friends have frequently shared with me how moved they are when they are ill and another close and dear friend who just sustained the loss of a loved one calls to see how they are doing. When you step out of your own pain and are present for another in pain, you heal yourself and contribute to the healing of others.

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” Carlos Castaneda

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

See Part 1 of Life Lessons Learned In Healing From Grief And Trauma

However, when difficult situations with others arise, you often fail to remember that you have a choice as to how to view the meaning of the loss or trauma. Frequently, tragedies, losses (of any kind, including loved ones, home, health, job or dreams) and life-threatening events are viewed from the negative perspective. While this is understandably part of the initial grieving process, you slow down your healing by spending needed energy viewing the situation as negative rather than positive in the months and years that follow the crisis.

Why is this? Perhaps, it is the fear that what has happened to another can happen again, and, perhaps, it is because you focus on the experience as a loss and, therefore, you spend more energy dwelling on the pain of separation from your loved one or anything you particularly value. The nature of human beings is that we tend to obsess more about our worries, anxieties, losses and negative life events than we do about those that are positive, joyful and which we may consider to be our blessings.

The truth is that the way you perceive a situation powerfully influences the healing of your body, mind and spirit. Remember that how you perceive a situation is a choice. How you choose to view or think about your situation dete rmines the path your healing will take.

“In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”…Albert Einstein

LIFE LESSONS LEARNED FROM GRIEF AND TRAUMA

I offer you the following suggestions to assist you in healing from grief and trauma. They are based on the lessons learned by my own patients.

1. Give yourself permission to truly feel your pain. Healing from trauma and grief does take time. It is an experience that affects every aspect of you, including your identity, thoughts, feelings, body and spirit. No matter how you try, your Higher Self will demand that you do the work of grief. Trying to escape the pain does not serve you. Healing is expedited when you do the best you can to express it, feel it and let it go. (CONTINUED)

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon

If, at all possible, take a meal to your friend or loved one or go out for a meal. Changing scenery is especially helpful for those who are grieving or who have not been well. Set aside a time for the two of you to get together, enabling him or her to have something special to which you both can look forward. Again, be sure to attend their feelings but balance the content with that which can shift the focus onto something other than their pain or illness..

Also, if your friend or loved one needs to be resting or lying quietly, you can be of assistance and help him or her by learning to use your breath. By consciously breathing slowly and deeply, without words, and just by sitting near the individual, you can help him or her align with your intentional relaxed breathing, causing him or her to be more at peace. Words are not always necessary. This is something that is especially nice for those who are very ill either at home or in the hospital or a hospice situation.

Keep in mind that being truly present is more about your being with someone as though this person is an extension of you and you are extending pure loving energy to this part of you. Presence is about love. Visualize your heart filling with loving energy and then visualize the energy going from your heart to the heart of your friend or loved one. This can be a powerful healing gift.

Whether you are near of far from your loved one or family member, always hold them in your heart with loving intentions. This serves their energy and yours.

Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”

©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon