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The Purpose Of Life: Live Like You Are Dying, Loving, Accepting And Healing What Is… (#3)
"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is. I believe in the latter" ~Albert Einstein
Kristine Carson, wife of Richard Carlson (author of Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff), writes in If You Had An Hour to Live, “Grieving is the ultimate act of love, or, at least, it can be. Love holds all possibilities, and that includes bliss in the face of immeasurable suffering and gain through loss.” Her point is that despite the grief and loss you experience, the quality of your Love determines whether you decide to choose to move into the pain and suffering associated with the darkness of grief – or into the warmth, peace and joy associated with the energy of the loving light. Your life’s purpose is a function of the choices you make. You are exactly where you are supposed to be because of the choices you make. Again, do your best and choose wisely!
Miracles are occurring all the time and Love is at the heart of miracles, according to the book, A Course in Miracles. Because we vibrate at such a high level energetically, when we choose Love in the form of Kindness and Loving Compassion for both ourselves and others, the body’s the immune system functions better (especially when dealing with a life-threatening illness or a significant loss). Perhaps this, again, is what motivates Tug McGraw’s character in his popular country song, Live Like You Were Dying, to want to go skydiving, fishing, bull riding and mountain climbing, as well as wishing to practice forgiveness. Loving oneself certainly includes following your hopes, dreams and long-lived passions, without the burden of anger and resentments.
As a researcher of miracles, and one who has witnessed real-life miracles, I have personally seen the stunning consequences, such as remissions and disappearances of different kinds of cancers, in my patients who have chosen to live fully in the moment, while treating themselves and others compassionately and lovingly. By choosing to take the time to become conscious of any thoughts or issues to which you have been attached and then detaching and practicing forgiveness, you shift your energy to a level which feels absolutely wonderful and initiates the release of valuable endorphins which enhance the functioning of your immune system.
Choosing to Face (acknowledge), Embrace (feel) and Replace your uncomfortable feelings such as anger, hurt, resentment, rage and disappointment, with more loving thoughts enables you to live more freely, without self- criticism or judgment. Miracles have everything to do with you choosing to see a situation or person from a more loving, kind and forgiving perspective. A change in perspective is often considered a miracle! For example, once you recognize that how you choose to think about your Uncle Fred really determines how you feel about him; if you choose to focus on how sweet he is rather than how annoying he can be, you actually feel much better, due to the release of needed endorphins. This is how easy it is!
A hero and mentor of mine, psychologist, scientist, author and survivor of two serious cancers, Paul Pearsall, states in Making Miracles, “Making miracles depends on understanding the profound truth that our perceptions create our reality and that there is always another view of every issue.” By choosing to live like you were dying, that is by detaching from anything that does not feel good and accepting what is, you will find yourself experiencing greater peace, joy and an overall enhanced quality of life. According to Pearsall, “Things-including miracles- do not just happen to us; we make them happen!”This is the power of your mind and your ability to choose to accept what is. This is your healing power!
“Making miracles is a matter of developing vigilance for the miracles all around us. If we are open to the miracles right under our very noses, and if we become miracles observers and unashamed practitioners of miracology, we are…much more likely to participate in the making of our own miracles.” ~Paul Pearsall, Ph.D, Author of Making Miracles
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun
©2010 Susan Barbara Apollon
Crises In Haiti:The Choice For Love, Miracles, Inspiration And Bliss
“Only if we understand can we care. Only if we care will we help. Only if we help shall they be saved.” ~ Jane Goodall
If you are looking for inspiration, miracles and feel good experiences, including bliss, then you have to look no further than the events in Haiti. Have you noticed that 9/11, Katrina, the tsunami and the earthquakes of Haiti have succeeded in uniting us as a country and as a world community in ways that no other force has been able to achieve. In simple terms, events that take our breath away, inspire each of us to make the choice for love which, in turn, leads to our experiencing an extraordinary sense of well-being and bliss.
Just think for a moment about recent weeks in which you have been traumatized, inspired, transformed and even able to experience your own healing as you stayed glued to your television, watching both the horror of the destruction of almost an entire nation, as well as the attempts to rescue those caught in the rubble of the destroyed homes and buildings. The turn of the clock and the shaking of the earth have forever changed the poorest country in the northern hemisphere, while, at the same time, deeply touching the heartstrings of the rest of us.
Have you wondered why it is that we are moved to choose to respond with love? The answer rests in part with Albert Einstein and his quantum physicist colleagues. Einstein believed that since everything is energy (and all energy vibrates), and love is among the highest of energies, we honestly are thy brother’s keeper. In other words, given that we can energetically merge with one another (because we are pure energy), the only way to treat one another is with compassion, love and kindness. Catastrophic events such as the colossal destruction in Haiti quickly remind us that we are a brotherhood, that we are in this together, and, therefore, we have a responsibility to care compassionately and lovingly for one another. That is what brothers, sisters and families do, isn’t it?
After all, there is an old saying that goes something like this: “ If not for the Grace of God, that could be me.” Haiti reminds us that we, too, could be in a similar situation. Mother Nature does not always give us advance warning. We identify with the pain of these people; we know it could be us in need of help at some point in the future. And, yes, as Einstein believed, we are thy brother’s keeper.
The fascinating paradox about a catastrophic event is that as horrible as it is, it provides opportunities for people everywhere to rise to an inspirational level of being the best they can be. As we choose to follow our hearts, do what feels right and behave lovingly, we create miracles and miracles feel good and blissful! (To be continued…)
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun
©2010 Susan Barbara Apollon
To Feel Bliss And Happiness, Make It Your Intention To Be Inspired By Life
“Life is my college.” Louisa May Alcott
“Where there is love, there is life.” Mohandas Gandhi
When interviewed for The Survivor Spirit, cancer patient, Jane Yamashiro stated: “Help may not come from where you expect, but it comes if you ask and are open to receiving it.” She also stated: “Why dwell on negative issues and load yourself with baggage when you can glide through life and enjoy the views? Life is wonderful when you let go and flow.” Jane allows herself to be inspired by life!
In my own life, I have made it my intention to be inspired by various people, places, situations and special words – and have created my dreams via putting my focus of intention on my sources of inspiration. For example, I have learned that I draw to me that with which I am vibrationally and energetically aligned and that the highest level of energetic vibration, for me, is Love. Thus, above a collage of family photographs in my kitchen hangs a wood carving with a favorite quote that has been a source of personal inspiration for me for more than twenty years: ‘I have learned to cherish those I love as though I would not have tomorrow.”
I am inspired by words that remind me of why I am here, who I am and how I can be of service. I am inspired by Love – every moment of every day. This includes actions of Love, words of Love and thoughts of Love. Love is such a high vibration that it has the power to make us feel genuinely good and happy and attract to us very positive, high energetic experiences, including healing miracles.
Healers inspire me, perhaps because their work is grounded on Love. When our fifteen year-old dog, Amber was diagnosed with cancer by our vet, which was later confirmed by the University of Pennsylvania, I chose to use a variety of healing techniques that I had learned from those healers whose work inspired me. These techniques involved, on a daily basis, experiencing a sense of merging into the Oneness with All There Is and then filling with overwhelming feelings of Love and projecting this Love onto Amber while touching and holding her.
I was also inspired to go on a wonderful healing retreat in which I studied the healing work of renowned psychologist, Larry LeShan (taught by his protégé, psychologist, Joyce Goodrich). LeShan has been honored by Harvard for his work in the area of intentional healing or distant intention.
For four days, I engaged in intentional healing meditations and experiences. The day after I returned home, I discovered, much to my amazement, that Amber’s right gum was no longer filled with the cancer. Instead, when I lifted her gum, I discovered healthy, pink tissue on both sides of her mouth. Even Amber’s vet, Dr. Louise Morin, validated that this was a legitimate extraordinary healing. Consequently, Amber lived almost two more years (to almost seventeen, most unusual for Golden Retrievers). Had I not been inspired to do the work of intentional healing, this would not have occurred.
As a result of my having been inspired, I chose to write about this in my book, Touched by the Extraordinary, so that others, perhaps you, might be inspired in a similar manner. I know that I am not unique. If I am able to apply such healing methods and intentions, so can you. In this way others may be inspired as I have been by so many beautiful souls. (To be continued…)
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun
©2009 Susan Barbara Apollon
To Feel Good, Be Happy & Find Your Bliss, Seek Out What Inspires You – And Be Inspired!
“You can do nothing to inspire the person in front of you, if you do not inspire yourself first.” Sogyal Rinpoche
Have you noticed that when you are in need of a feel-good experience, and you find something or someone that fills you with inspiration, you suddenly feel so much better – even bliss and joy? And, you may even feel a sense of intuitive wisdom or purpose rising up within you.
Awareness of what inspires you can be a key to your happiness, bliss, experiencing healing and even living with a sense of purpose. Just consider the beautiful, heartwarming story of Susan Boyle, which, thanks to the internet, has spread around the globe.
Personally, listening to the newest internet sensation, Susan Boyle, became my most recent source of inspiration. I click to listen, knowing that I will cry and be moved to tears as I listen to the gift of her unexpected magnificent voice.. Quite a paradox, if you stop and think about it.
An international sensation taking the world by surprise, Susan Boyle, in the video of her performance on Britain’s Got Talent, has touched hearts everywhere. No one, that I can recall, has inspired so many people throughout the world just by singing one song, amazing as that song is.
Seeing and hearing Susan sing I Dream a Dream from the Broadway show, Les Miserables, brings tears to just about everyone who experiences her. Is it because a dowdy 47 year-old woman surprises us with an unbelievable voice? Are we moved by the stunned looks and words of the three judges, some of whom are known for being rather nasty and sharp tongued with contestants who resemble Susan, an older gal, from a little village in Scotland, dressed plainly and with little or no makeup? Is it that the music is extraordinary? Or is it because, perhaps, we see ourselves in Susan, each of us holding a dream – a vision -, which we are able to make a reality before we come to the end of our life, as she does with this moving, superb and incredible performance?
And why is it that we like to listen to Susan sing I Dream a Dream as often as we do? Perhaps, it is because she inspires us. Yes, she represents hope that we, too, may be able to bring our dreams to fulfillment. When I hear Susan sing, I am inspired; that is, I am infused with the spirit of Hope, Joy, Enthusiasm, Possibility and Love. I feel good hearing her magnificent voice. She is a symbol of hope for me and for all of us that we need to hold onto vision– that anything and everything is possible.
When you choose to focus on someone or something which inspires you, you feel wonderful, full of hope, motivation and joy, enabling you to experience an energetic higher quality of life. A word or two of advice: If you want to feel good, make it a point to become more aware of what it is that inspires and infuses you with life-giving energy, joy and purpose. You will have a win-win situation! (To be continued…)
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
& Intuition Is Easy & Fun
©2009 Susan Barbara Apollon
Finding Bliss And Peace Via Choosing Meaningful Rituals
“Ritual, when it is done in its purest, truest sense, is done in space that is called sacred.”
Jeanne Achterberg
Have you noticed how you feel when your mind and your heart wander back to times spent with your family, be it a trip each year to spend holidays with your grandparents or a vacation you would take every summer with your folks, perhaps at the beach or mountains. Such memories tend to fill you with a sense of peace, comfort, bliss and stability. These are also rituals which are high vibrational energetic experiences and which have the power to heal.
Rituals are not just those events or ceremonies (sometimes with feeling and sometimes not!) associated with religious moments, such as baptisms, communions and Bar Mitvahs. Actually, a ritual can be any activity which is deemed by you to be meaningful and even has a sense of sacredness to it because it feels so special (in a positive way) , powerful and has a meaning near and dear to your heart. Rituals do contribute to your feeling your bliss and feeling good. And, you have the power to create the high vibrational energetic rituals you need and desire in your life.
Just by choosing life, you choose activities that become rituals which give your life meaning – and a meaning which feels good and which sustains you. Though you may not be conscious of this, you are assigning meaning to everything you do – every moment of every day – and the meaning you give to your activities (or rituals ) is what determines the quality of your moment, day and life. Given that everything is energy, make it a point to choose feel-good meaningful rituals.
Perhaps you have noticed that the rituals which bring you joy, such as the times you spend snuggling with your cat, walking your dog each day or regularly baking cookies or fishing with a grandparent or parent, praying and/or meditating daily in your favorite location are those that have a quiet, even subtle sacredness to them. This is a sacredness which may not be obvious to you until you are in your early or later adult years and are recalling earlier times in your life. If you question your life’s meaning and purpose, be sure to revisit your experience of family and community activities in which you have joyfully engaged on a repeated basis throughout your life.
What is it about rituals that is responsible for you feeling such bliss? Well, just remembering or thinking about the times you have spent celebrating graduations, anniversaries, birthdays, births, housewarmings and marriages, provides you with a sense of belonging to someone, something, some place and being a part of a community. And, feeling that you belong feels good!
Also, have you noticed that you do not feel so terribly isolated, lonely or inadequate when you recall feel good memories such as attending school athletic games, high school and college dances, and participation in events such as walkathons, community charities and church and synagogue activities? Focusing on such feel-good experiences enables you to experience a greater sense of well-being and wholeness – definitely peace and bliss.
Indeed, your life is filled with rituals – all of which add richness, depth and joy to what might otherwise be considered simply “existing.” Consider for a moment the events we participate in which revolve around various entertainment events, be it getting together each year to watch the Oscars, the Tonys or Super Bowl games. There are rituals surrounding these activities as well as those involving the parades we attend each year, the barbecues we hold and fireworks we watch each July;
Take a moment and consider a ritual or ceremony you could create that would bring you comfort and peace and then of how you could integrate this into your life.. (To be continued.)
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©2009SusanBarbara Apollon
The Healing Power Of Loving Relationships
How many times have you felt low, called a friend or family member and soon found yourself laughing, smiling and feeling so much better? Your health and the quality of your life are tied to the quality of your relationships (which may include your pets!) and your community of support. What is it that your relationships have that has the ability to enable healing to occur?
To answer this question, I share with you beliefs of one of my special mentors, Dr. Jeanne Achterberg, a psychologist and author known for her outstanding research dealing with imagery, healing, prayer, intention and her work with those who are diagnosed with life-threatening illnesses. In her newest work, her audiobook, Intentional Healing (available though Sounds True), which I highly recommend, she has described the five bonds of relationships which expedite healing. The essence of these bonds has been the heart of my work as a psychologist and a healer. They are the following:
The first of these bonds is the invisible energetic expression of Consciousness which includes distant healing, prayer, intentions and Mind. Einstein and his fellow physicists called these invisible ties “nonlocal mind” and emphasized their belief that we are all connected on some level. Thus, if I care for and pray for you – with the intention of healing, you will be impacted physiologically – and so will I! Loving intention establishes real ties between us. Scientific research has established this.
The second of these healing bonds is the power of Touch. Within relationships, you seek and need connection with one another through touch. Touch can be a big hug or kiss, a tap on the shoulder, cuddling, embracing, making love or petting your special pet, be it your dog, cat, horse or any other precious pet. Keep in mind that age does not slow or diminish the healing power of touch; indeed, it increases the need for touch. .
Why is touch so important? The healing power of touch is that it affirms you are a being with value and you are lovable. This is what you especially need to experience when you are diagnosed with a life-threatening illness and feel so isolated and apart from the world. If you are a caretaker, you, too, are in need of warm, compassionate and loving touch.
The third bond is that of Presence. Just your loving presence has the power to heal. You are pure energy and capable of feeling the energy of others. When you choose to be a loving presence, you are choosing to be unconditional Love, which conveys Truth and Love.
In Touched by the Extraordinary, you can read the story of physician Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, who hired the hospital cleaning attendant to be her special assistant. Why? Because this beautiful soul, who had traveled the difficult path of tragically losing her own baby while waiting for doctors in an emergency room, brought, as a loving presence, peace to Kubler-Ross’s patients who were dying. Having been personally affected and changed by the loss of her baby, this woman had the gift of being able to sooth and comfort those who were close to death.
For years I have been advocating the fourth bond described by Achterberg as the bond of a “Soul to Soul” relationship. As you live your life, no matter who you are, your goal should be relating to others at the soul level, rather than in the formal traditional roles, such as doctor-patient, parent-child and teacher-student. The “soul to soul” level is one that affirms your awareness of -and connection with- the higher part of one another, that part which is connected to the Source of each of you. When you begin to be conscious of being connected to one another as souls, love in the form of compassion, kindness and caring, comes so much more naturally.
Finally, the last bond, Love, is one which greatly contributes to your well-being. The fact that you know you are loved by another and that this love is something which is forever, conveys an eternal sense of support. Recent scientific research studies have shown that when a relationship is perceived as loving and supportive, there is a definite correlation with improved health, including fewer heart attacks and deaths, relative to the rest of the population.
The bottom-line message here is that you expedite your own healing when you choose to live your life within the embrace of a loving, caring and compassionate community of family and friends.
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon
Lessons Learned From Grief And Trauma (Part 3)
8. The pain of a loss or trauma is locked into your cells. Healing requires that you balance your pain with thoughts of a lighter energy. Give yourself permission to focus on what makes you laugh, even if you do not feel like laughing! Balance your pain with time to watch a comedy or time to meet and be with friends (push yourself if you feel you can’t or don’t want to do this). By doing this, you are helping you immune system recover and be able to better protect you from the aftermath of your loss or trauma.
9. With grief and trauma, often come an outpouring of expressions of care, compassion, kindness, love, and prayers. Allow yourself to be deeply touched by such a showering of love. This can forever transform you so that you become more aware of the choice you can make to be equally caring, loving and kind. You may find that you are becoming aware, also, of the power of your own love, appreciation and gratitude for your blessings. Take time to express your heartfelt thanks. This, too, expedites your healing process.
For example, patients and friends have frequently shared with me how moved they are when they are ill and another close and dear friend who just sustained the loss of a loved one calls to see how they are doing. When you step out of your own pain and are present for another in pain, you heal yourself and contribute to the healing of others.
“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” Carlos Castaneda
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon
See Part 1 of Life Lessons Learned In Healing From Grief And Trauma
Life Lessons Learned In Healing From Grief And Trauma – Part 2
When we come to the last moment of this lifetime and look back, the only thing that’s going to matter is ‘What was the quality of our love?’” Richard Bach
2. Be open to changing your perspective! The experience of grief and trauma can contribute to your changing your thinking about what is truly important in life. For example, following the occurrence of a significant tragedy or loss, you may find yourself amazed at the decreased importance and attention you give to what were formerly valued items, perhaps a fancy car, china or clothing, or to participation in previously favored activities, such as sports, your job, traveling or entertainment.
3. Recognize the importance of Love in your life’s journey. You may even learn from your pain and suffering that the only thing that really matters is the person you love and your loving relationship with this individual. My husband taught me this years before we married (some 44 years ago!). Walking along a boating dock, the little bag I held that contained his rings and watch slipped from my hands, went through the boards and into the water, never to be seen again. I cried profusely, feeling great guilt, and will always remember his words: “Don’t worry, Susan. The only thing that matters is you. I can replace the jewelry; I can’t replace you.” His love touched, healed and soothed my pain of disappointing him!
4. In dealing with the pain of a tragedy, loss or grief, healing occurs as you discover that you are much stronger than you thought you were. Suddenly, being forced into roles that your ill or deceased loved ones once held, be it holding down a full-time job, paying the bills, maintaining your home or car, or creating your social life, you may find that you are now taking responsibility for areas of your life that you previously felt you were unable to handle.
5. With your new- found sense of personal strength, you may learn that you are more powerful than you had thought, more capable and more resilient. This new awareness may enhance your self-esteem, self-confidence and your belief in yourself. All of these are gifts because they come at a time when you are left feeling powerless, frightened and worried about your ability to survive. Tragedy often validates your ability to be a survivor, one who can handle whatever curve ball may come your way. My patients have repeatedly shared their awareness with me of how much braver and more courageous they feel they are, having proved to themselves they can survive without their loved ones
6. You learn that there are questions that better serve you than asking “Why did this happen?”, a normal response to such events. By asking “What is this teaching me?” and “What is the lesson I need to learn here?”, you find that you have an enhanced ability to cope with such stressful experiences. For example, such questions often move us from perceiving ourselves as victims to realizing that we have the resources to deal with such challenges. They also move us along in our having a sense of purpose, despite our angst and pain.
7. View the events as challenges or opportunities to learn valuable life lessons; patience, courage, compassion or forgiveness. Asking the previously mentioned questions helps you become more conscious of which life lessons you are here to learn. This, in turn, again, leads to a stronger sense of connection with your own Higher Power or God, as well as a change in your perspective about the meaning of such losses and traumas. Allow your perspective to become broader, inviting in more wonderful possibilities about life, its purpose and whether life continues in a somewhat different form; allow this change in perspective to soothe and heal the pain of your broken heart. (TO BE CONTINUED)
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
©Copyright 2008 Susan Barbara Apollon
A Gift of Intuition
Lisa, a delightful and interesting woman who had called my office to offer complements regarding Touched by the Extraordinary, shared the following true story with me.
She explained that when she had lived in Yardley, PA, more than a decade before, she recalled a very nice family that lived across the street from her.. According to Lisa, the parents had two sons, one of whom had Leukemia and who had eventually died. Lisa was deeply affected by this and empathetically felt the family’s pain.
Feeling great compassion for the parents, Lisa was drawn to their situation. On her daily walks, she would often find herself focusing on their home, wondering how they were managing. After the death of the one son, at the time of the Jewish holiday, Passover, Lisa’s attention was caught by something unusual.
It was the evening of the first of the two Seders that are a part of the Passover tradition. Lisa, in her mind’s eye, had seen a young man enter the house, along with an elderly gentleman. She described the elderly man as portly and wearing a very, very crumbled suit, as though it had been intentionally crumbled.
Louise said that when she met Ann, a few days after the first Seder, she asked how things had gone with her company. Ann was surprised by Lisa’s question and replied that they had not had visitors for the holiday. Lisa quickly noted what she had seen; when finished with her description of the older man, Ann’s jaw dropped in astonishment.
“That is my father, this person you describe,” Ann said with certainty. She continued: “ He was born in France and he died many years ago. How could you have known this? I never discussed it with you.” Lisa explained that she had, indeed, seen the two individuals enter the house. However, she had seen them in her mind’s eye, rather than with her physical eyes. Ann was truly amazed, though not surprised
In fact, Ann told Lisa that she had actually felt the presence of others at the Seder table. This gift was the validation of her sense that it had been her son and her father who were present and sharing the holiday with them. This touched and comforted her so very much.
When I questioned Lisa about her ability to do this, she replied that it only happens when she feels a genuine sense of affection for the individual. In other words, your intuition is rooted in a foundation of compassionate love; it is the power of love that reinforces and enhances your intuitive powers.
It all starts with love! And, we are all capable of knowing and sensing what Lisa experienced. It takes practice and the intent to relax, go into the silent stillness deep within you, stay in the Now, fill your heart with love and focus this on another being with the intention of receiving whatever you need to receive on their behalf. Take time to play with this and before you know it, you will be seeing with your mind’s eye, just as Lisa does.
Susan Barbara Apollon
Author of “Touched By The Extraordinary”
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